Proof of much your support means to me

Those of you who know me, know that I've always been the 'glass half-full' type. I'm always positive, to the point where I'm sure it gets irritating for some. And so, I'm not really sure what to do with sadness. Don't get me wrong, I get sad sometimes, but I always find a way to shake it off about as quickly as it grips me. A couple weeks ago, however, when I decided to start this fundraiser for Val, I found that sad feeling really hard to shake. The thing is, for some reason, I've never really allowed myself to think of FOP as a big part of our lives. I wouldn't quite say that I block its existence out of my mind, but some part of me definitely likes to pretend that Val doesn't really have it, or it's not really that bad, or that at the end of the day, she's going to be fine. This kind of logic (or denial) became impossible once I began mentally planning for this fundraiser. Working out details in my head, thinking about my next steps, trying to figure out my hopes and goals, along with all of the other things I was thinking about, meant that I was constantly painfully aware of FOP and its increasing effect on my sister's life.

I found myself trying not to cry as I was doing laps at the Athletic Centre and brushing away tears and simultaneously sweating on the elliptical. Part of me hated myself for being sad because I feel like I have no right to be sad. After all, I'm not the one who lives with FOP every day like my sister and so many others do. I used the frustration that I was feeling to fuel my workouts, but found that I was unable to focus in my classes. I started feeling lethargic, and began to be concerned about how I was going to finish the school year.

Luckily, an email from my future sister-in-law encouraging me in my efforts was enough to bring back the real me, the positive me. I began to see this whole thing in a positive light and began also to get really excited about it. I got to work and created the facebook group and invited everyone I knew. I made an announcement to my entire family about my intentions and encouraged everyone I knew to spread the word. Next thing I knew, a community of people who are incredibly supportive and caring had developed around Val and I. I now receive daily messages from people who I haven't talked to in years, or who I've never talked to in my life, showing their enormous amounts of support for my efforts and concern for my sister. I want to tell everybody who has shown their support just how much it truly means to me and, of course, Val. Your open-heartedness is what keeps me so excited about this and pumped to continue.

From the bottom of my heart, thank you.